Back from my quiz... Nothing like trying to do chemistry problems when you're high on Sudafed. But I think I did alright - we'll see. If my brain responded correctly to the drugs, then I will, in fact, be doing good chemistry. Ba-dum dum.
ATTENTION ANNOYING DRIVERS
So, I need to ask this: What the fuck do you people do while sitting at a red light that you NEVER see it turn green? EVERY TIME I am at a light, and I mean, EVERY DAMN TIME, the first car at the light is always sitting there a good 10-15 seconds after it turns green. Are you waiting for a particular shade of green? Are you color blind? If that's the case, when the TOP light is lit, GO, goddamn it.
If I am the first car, I am diligently watching the light so I can GO when it turns. I don't feel the need to hang out a bit longer in that spot. I don't understand what could be so distracting. For crissakes, I have ADD, and I can manage to hit the gas pedal nanoseconds after the light turns. I can also change radio stations, swap CDs, pick up my coffee for a sip, bite my bagel and scratch myself and NOT TAKE MY EYES OFF THE LIGHT. This is not difficult multi-tasking, people. Don't be gazing off at the jackass in the car next to you picking his nose, or at the pretty birds flying over head. Do that when you're driving. (Just not when I am near you, especially when I am on my motorcycle.)
That's another thing: People driving cars who are motorcycle blind. How the fuck does that happen? How do you not see a big shiny object with a bright headlight driving towards you? Give motorcycles some room when you're behind them. Don't drive up their ass -- if you just tap the tire, you will send the rider over the handlebars. Don't make quick turns in front of them, either. A fender bender for you means possible death for me or some other rider. (Or a big-ASS lawsuit for you if I survive ... and I'm really adept at getting license plate numbers while airborne.)
If you can't drive, WALK. Just not in NYC where you most likely will walk too damn slow and annoy everyone.
Better yet, just stay the hell home and watch Anna Nicole Smith and Jeopardy re-runs.
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