The amount of stuff I need to do before I leave here in July is almost too overwhelming to think about. But, I am taking lots of deep breaths and pushing forward. Despite learning that I would need to take out a $250k loan to get me through the next 4 years, I am still thrilled to be this fortunate. I am definitely sensing a much-needed calmness has come over me. The anxiety of "will I or won't I get in" is gone. But not forgotten. Every morning I wake up, sip my coffee and remember all over again - it's a great feeling.
I am now counting in weeks instead of months when I will be leaving. I don't think I will add a counter to the site, though. Even though West coast living and going to med school are my two biggest dreams, I am having a hard time just thinking about saying goodbye.
The current plan is to leave Connecticut on July 25 -- classes begin first week of August and I will be making the trek cross country via car. Until that day comes, I still need to finish the biochemistry class that I am taking (and will have to retake as a medical student weeks after finsihing it), find a place to live in the Bay Area, get several loans, possibly find a renter for my house, and then pack. (Sadly, I think learning how to cook is an out-of-reach goal. It will have to get put into my 5-yr plan, right behind French fluency and a black belt in something.)
Ugh.
So, I distract myself my checking out all the cool books and medical supplies I have to buy for the first day of school -- a bit more than the compass and protractor I had to get in high school. Stethoscope, sphygmamometer (blood pressure cuff), scrubs!!, latex gloves in mass quantities, microscope, and all kinds of shiny objects.
I also find myself watching shows like House, ER, and Grey's Anatomy with a renewed interest - and from a different perspective. I guess I am mentally preparing for the abuse that will soon be a regular part of my life.
The only thing I am not prepared for is the sleep deprivation. I am planning to do a lot of that in the next few weeks, along with enjoying my last moments of freedom as much as humanly possible.
Posted by LA at May 06, 2005 09:01 PM