Mom (on phone with Deb): I downloaded some MacAfee application and now I can't get onto the Internet.
Deb (to me, annoyed): Your mother downloaded another application and now her computer isn't working.
Me: Shocking.
Deb (to Mom): Why did you download that!?! We told you a million time not to download anything without asking us first.
Me (from the bathroom): Ha! Some things will never change. In 3 weeks, she's YOUR problem.
Mom (yelling into phone): What is that witch saying!?!?!
Deb: Go to control panel and uninstall it. And no, we are not coming over now to fix it... Because... Because... No. NO. Because.
Me: (now from the sanctity of my office): Ha. Hahahahaha. Ha.
Mom: But I got a message saying I needed this for my PC!
Deb: You don't need it. Your PC is fine. Uninstall it.
Me: If I told you that you needed a kick in the ass, would you just automatically bend over?
Mom: So, how do I uninstall this?
Me (fingers in ears): Blah blah blah blah....
Deb: (mumbles something about the uninstallation technique while I pretend to be 5 yrs old.)
Mom (now to me): I can't believe you're leaving me.
Me: Catholic guilt doesn't work on me anymore. Ha.
Mom: You're mean.
Me: It's called boundaries -- I have them now. 38 years late, but nevertheless...